Happy Birthday Charlie Jace Asanti Gulker!!!

1 Year ago, our lives were blessed by your entrance into this world, Charlie Jace!! I can remember almost every detail of that day like it was yesterday. I remember sitting anxiously in the hospital lobby by the water fountain, waiting for any kind of news. Our caseworker, Michelle, showed up & said we could go up. She then got a text & gave us the news that you were born!! You weighed 6 lbs 7 oz & were 18.5 inches long! I couldn't even imagine how tiny you were! We followed Michelle up the steps & started zigzagging through the hallways. We had no idea where we were & then we turned the corner. I'm sure time stopped for me for a few moments & then things moved in slow motion until we were right by your side. You were in the bassinet right next to the window & we just fell in love instantly! I wanted to scoop you up & hold you forever! We got to stay in the nursery for a while & got to feed you your first bottle. Your daddy tried to tell me not to get attached but I knew at that moment, I was looking at my son & the love was instant. We tried the many different names we had talked about & you were a Charlie right from the beginning. We marveled at how God had formed you so perfectly & we were amazed how wonderful His ways are! He knit you together in your first momma's womb because you, Charlie Jace, are fearfully & wonderfully made! He set you in our family & we couldn't feel more blessed to be your parents!

Where I Was

1 year ago, we were on our way to where Charlie was going to be born. I have been so sentimental lately. I seriously can't believe he's going to be 1 already! Tonight I had the wonderful pleasure of talking with the woman who gave Charlie life. It was so great to hear from her & I'm sure it was the first of many phone calls to come. She loves Charlie so much & I'm so grateful that he will know that. Only 3 more days till Charlie's birthday & I'm sure to be a mess. We are so blessed to have him in our lives & I can't wait to celebrate him!

I'm Procrastinating

Isn't bad that i'm typing a blog post just to get out of folding the 3-4 loads of laundry sitting next to me?? I can complain about never getting anything done anymore but I know I can play just as big of a role in that too. Charlie is taking a nap & Jackson is playing a new game on his Nintendo DS. I'm now sitting at my computer, sipping my coffee and now typing this post.

I have been finding it difficult to manage my time lately. This has been made more evident when I'm doing my Bible study about God wanting all of me and not just a small part of me. I know this to be true but I have been failing miserably. I make the excuses of wanting "me" time when it seems like all day I have 5 others who want "my" time. It hasn't helped that Charlie has been sick with a nasty cold & I think I literally held him for 7 days straight! He's now doing better but he found it quite nice to ride on my hip the entire day so he follows me around until I put him in his favorite spot, my arms. Ok, I guess a part of me loves that he wants to be near me constantly! He loves his momma and the feeling is very mutual!

Back to prioritizing my time! I need to do it. I need to shut out all other distractions. TV, computer, phones, etc. Anyone have any good ways to keep myself accountable?

Reminiscing

Today was 1 year ago that we received THE phone call Charlie's birthmom had chosen us & she was due in a couple of weeks. We were on our way to get our fingerprints re-done since they expire after 1 year. I was very frustrated with the whole adoption process at this point & really questioning what God had in store for us. We knew that there were 2 birthmom's that were sent our profile that week but we knew it could be a while before we heard anything. It came as a total shock to me when I saw the number show up on my phone! Miss A had gotten our profile book that morning & we got the call just a couple hours later. She said she just knew it was us. When I answered the phone, we were only a couple of miles away from where we needed to be & Alexa was in the car with us. Brian & I had agreed after our failed adoption that we were going to keep our next situation to ourselves as much as possible. With her in the car, I was trying to get as much info as possible from the agency & tell Brian that we were chosen without Alexa knowing. Yeah, that didn't work. She caught on right away but we told her that she had just wanted to talk to us first. I'm still surprised they got my prints without getting smudged because my hands were shaking so bad! I was excited & scared out of my mind all at the same time. I didn't want to get my hopes up like last time but we also had a better feeling from the beginning this time around. The next 3 weeks were a major roller coaster but we all know how it ends. with a beautiful little boy, Charlie Jace, who will forever be our son!

Picture Post

So what's been going on here? Everything & nothing all at the same time. It seems like the days have blurred together & I can't even remember which day had what in it anymore. Here's a really quick update on everyone.

Alexa- She's as busy as every. Still working at Subway, being drill team captain & also has started soccer conditioning. I know she's really excited for soccer season but this momma is not quite so sure. It's brutal with us at games 5-6 times a week. Let's just pray for a very, very nice spring!! We've just started looking at the whole college thing & to say that freaks me out is an understatement. Is it wrong of me to secretly hope she totally bombs her ACT's so that no college will take her?? Just kidding! I know she'll do fine & any college will be lucky to have her. Let's just hope it not too far from home!

Emma- Tomorrow is a day that Emma's been waiting for, for a long time! AAU volleyball starts!! This is her first year & she just can't wait for it. It will be 8 weeks every Saturday so that does make things nuts but we do enjoy watching volleyball. Time will tell how Jackson & Charlie will do with it! Wish us luck!

Wyatt- He's all about ice fishing right now. Think he's like his father much?? Add in a little Sports Center & he's as happy as ever! I really don't know another 8 year old boy that likes basketball & football as much as he does. Unfortunately, college football is done & his Packers are done so the Super Bowl won't be as much fun for him. At least he thinks he's so good at fishing that he thinks he can give pointers to his dad & uncle to become better fishermen. He is for sure a Gulker!!

Jackson- Don't even know where to start with this one! Jackson is just Jackson. Funny & aggravating all at the same time. I do love this little boy so much & life would be so much more dull without him but he is 1 busy four year old!! Preschool next year will be great for this kid. He is really starting to teach Charlie to do some things & it is so precious. I would like to know if anyone has any tips on getting this boy to stop taking the wheels off of any toy vehicle we have! It drives me nuts!

Charlie- We are off to the ENT with Charlie in about 10 days. 4-5 ear infections in 4 months is enough for me! He is such a happy little boy & loves his sleep so when he doesn't sleep well, we know something isn't right. I hope that if we need to do tubes that it works! He is just growing & learning so fast! He is crawling all over & is standing up by everything. He is also walking along all the furniture & we've caught him standing next to things & letting go. He really is so laid back that I really didn't expect him to be doing this already. I was fully expecting him to be a late walker but he does have 4 older siblings to keep up with. This has also caused us to baby proof in a hurry. What kid doesn't love to play in the toilet?? Yuck!!

Ok, that's all the time I got right now! This is all ya get for an update!!!

Never Thought It Would Affect Me This Way

Yesterday was Martin Luther King Jr Day. While I've studied in history class about him & what he stood for, I don't know if I ever took the time to realize what his movement back in in 1963 would mean to my life and my family. I truly believe that without the civil rights movement that he started, transracial adoption would not be as accepted as it is today. It would not be okay for a white family to adopt a black child. I can't even think about not having Charlie in our lives. He is our son, grandson, brother, nephew & cousin. He is not defined by the color of skin. He is a child of God just like every person on this earth.


"I have a dream . . . that one day little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls and walk together as sister and brothers." Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. The dream is alive, Dr. King