Our Adoption Video

I will be posting pics of baptism later but this is the video that we showed at church this morning. We had a wonderful day celebrating Charlie & I hope that you enjoy our video!

8 Weeks old

How is Charlie already 8 weeks old?? It's going so fast! I love seeing him grow & doing so well but it's always sad to never get that time back. He is smiling up a storm & learning to coo like crazy! Melts my heart! He is such a good baby & is now sleeping about 7 hours at night. To me that is nuts because I've never had a baby sleep that long at this age. When we finally knew he was ours, one of the first things I said to him was that I hoped he liked soccer & to be on the go! Well, he certainly does! He's just so easy going & he's already been at his fair share of soccer! He'll have many hours of sports watching under his belt by the time he gets his own chance at it! He is almost 10 pounds! Yes, he's still little but he is growing nicely & he loves to eat! We seriously can't imagine our lives without him here & we all love him so much! Here's a couple of recent pictures. I don't have too many since I've so sick but I caught a few good ones of him smiling!

I Never Knew....

I never knew......that being a mom could be so difficult.

I never knew......that being a mom could also be so rewarding in that same moment it is so difficult.

I never knew......that my heart could almost burst with so much love for my children.

I never knew.....that the adoption journey would be as difficult as it was/is.

I never knew.....that this same journey would be 1 of the biggest blessings in my life.

I never knew.....I could love a child who is not of my own flesh just as if he was.

I never knew....I could feel so much love for the woman who gave our son the gift of life.

I never knew....the journeys that God would take me on so that I would learn over & over to just trust Him.

I never knew....that in almost 5 years, not a day would go by that I wish I had all 6 of my children to hold here on earth.

I never knew....that most of these thing I never knew would make me who I am today.

Blah!

We've been sick around here again. This time it was both Brian & I. At the same time. With the worst strep we've both ever had. 2 sick parents + 5 children= HELP!!!  We both wanted to call our mommies to come bail us out but we knew that both of them were busy. Thankfully, we both alternated our good moments vs bad moments until Alexa got home from work on Saturday.So glad that she's at the age where she can help out in that way. She did tell me I could have my job back though! ha! No need for child development for that kid! She living it! 

The bad thing is that we had baptism scheduled for Charlie on Sunday & dinner planned for right after that with both of our families. Both of us knew it wasn't an option with how sick we were. I didn't really get out of bed all day Sunday & I'm pretty sure we would have spread germs everywhere. We have so looked forward to this day & we didn't want to just get through it. We want to enjoy & reflect on 1 of God's greatest promises for us & our children. It can be rescheduled & food can be reheated & made again. We know that some family won't be able to be there & I hate that! But you got to do what you got to do!

So now we are in recovery mode & it's been slow going for me. No moving too fast for me! Yuck! Everyday is getting better but I am not near where I'd like to be. Just disappointing for me since this is my last week at home because I go back to work on Monday. Not what I had in mind for this week! I guess if nothing else, it made me slow down & just sit with my boys, at least during the day. Of course kids still need to be brought to the gazillionth soccer game of the season. Okay, maybe exaggerated there but still, wow! We've seen a ton of soccer between the 3 kids! Good thing I enjoy watching soccer & there's lots of space for Jackson to run.

Hope to post some new pictures of Charlie soon! I've been taking them but just haven't had the energy or time to post them! Hope everyone in Iowa is enjoying this warm weather!

A Whole New Appreciation

This Sunday is Mother's Day. What most people don't know is that Saturday is Birth Mother's Day. I honestly didn't know that either until recently but you better believe that we will always be celebrating that day from now on. So in honor of Birth Mother's Day, I wanted to write something to honor Miss A and other birth moms.

Who do you think of when birth mothers are mentioned? Do you think of poor, uneducated, drug addicts who don't "want" their children? Do you always view them as young and unmarried? Do you think that all of them are just promiscuous, un-Christian women who should know better? If this is what your idea of them are, then you are wrong! While some of these women who carry the title "birth mom" might be in this category, that is not always the case. Thanks to some of the made for TV movies, this is the perception that has been wrongfully given.

While looking into domestic adoption, we found that the majority of moms who place their children for adoption are in their 20's and already have 1 or more children to care for. In alot of cases, the parents are just not in a position to care for any more children so they chose lovingly to place the child with a family that can. The pregnancy itself may not be planned but most of these women who choose life for these children love them and would probably choose to parent if their circumstances were different. No matter what her story may be, the decision to place these children is never an easy one and they will have to grieve the loss of raising this child that she hasn't given birth to. The decision is not a selfish one. Quite the opposite, in fact. She loves this child so much that she would rather make the decision to give her child a better life and learn to cope with the loss she now faces. In our eyes, Charlie's birthmom is our hero. She is an amazing woman who has strength beyond words! We pray that she knows how much we care for her and that she knows the love of God in her life.

Everyone has a story. Everyone has a history. These women who are birthmoms are no exception. Their stories make them who they are, just like you and me. They deserve respect and they deserve understanding. Most of all, they deserve the love of the families that are raising their children because they are the most precious gift!

I ask that if you know a birthmom in real life, that you take the chance to tell her Happy Birthmom's Day on Saturday. These women deserve the recognition of their selfless choice!

Where to Begin....Part 3

Things have been crazy around here so this post just hasn't had time to get written. Let's just say soccer games, a concussion for Wyatt & Jackson biting through his lip(twice) has been partly to blame. I think we are on the mend but I'm about ready to put my kids in bubble wrap & duct tape them to their beds just to keep them safe! Okay, now to the final chapter of our trip to Utah! Warning! It is long!

So, Sunday night was filled butterflies in the stomach. I knew the only way I would sleep is if I had help from Tylenol PM. Love that stuff! I slept the entire night until my alarm rang but as soon as my eyes were open, my stomach was instantly nauseous! I quickly got up & got in the shower to get ready. We had to be at the hospital at 8:30 but we were never told what time the c-section was scheduled. We went down to eat breakfast but I seriously was having trouble getting anything down. I know some people are stress eaters but not me! I was gagging with every bite! I chuckle at it now but that's just how I roll!

We arrive at the hospital at 8:30 & we were told that our caseworker would meet us in the lobby. 15 minutes went by & no sign of her. Now I know that isn't a long amount of time normally but in this case, it seemed to take forever! I get a text then that a different caseworker was going to meet us & that she would be there in a few minutes. Again, 15 minutes later, nothing! Finally she shows up & we get up to start walking to labor & deliver with her. Her phone beeps & she gives us the news that a baby boy had been born, 6lbs 7 oz, 18 inches long & very healthy! I could hardly contain myself knowing that as I sat there & said prayer after prayer that our son had been born! We walk up the steps in the hospital & through a couple of doors not knowing at all where we were going. We make a turn to the right & right next to the nursery window, we see our son for the first time. It was such a surreal moment! I couldn't believe that after a year of waiting & all the heartaches, we were able to see him & touch him! There still was a part of me that really couldn't believe that this little boy would be ours because of our previous failed situation. Brian had told me right after seeing him to not get attached. Um, okay! That's not gonna happen! I was in love with him from the moment I laid eyes on him & I knew I would be devastated if this fell through. While we were in the nursery loving on him, we got a text that Miss A wanted to sign papers as soon as it was legal to do so. We knew this was a good sign but it was no guarantee. We asked about Miss A often & how she was doing & the plan was for us to meet her that afternoon. She also wanted alone time with him until she was discharged. We decided to leave for lunch & come back at 1pm to meet her. And yes, nerves in the stomach were horrible! We went to a flower shop to order flowers for Miss A because we knew that she was so far from any family that she had & we wanted her to know how special she was. We were then told to come at 4pm to meet Miss A & met our caseworker in the lobby again. I was nervous but also very excited to finally meet her & talk with her face to face. We went in & saw immediately how beautiful she was! Our first meeting wasn't long but we wanted to give her plenty of time to rest & to spend with Charlie. It was at this time that we talked names with her & she wanted us to name him.  We also got to talk more about her family & see some pictures of them. I loved getting a chance to getting to know her better & the conversation went very well. We were able to check on Charlie & Miss A a couple times that afternoon/night and we decided to go to bed early since it had been a long, emotional day. The plan made by Miss A was to sign papers at 9 am  & she wanted to be discharged that afternoon.  The caseworkers & us tried to get her to stay longer but she had already been away from her family for 2 1/2 weeks longer than she had originally planned & she just wanted to get home. We were told to be at the hospital at 9 am to sign our papers. Again, Tylenol PM was my friend! I slept all night!

Waking up Tuesday morning was even worse than it was Monday morning, as we knew this was the day that would decide if Charlie would become a permanent part of our family. As nervous as we were for this to go according to our plan, we knew that this was going to be very difficult day for Miss A. After talking with her the day before, we got to see just how much she loved Charlie & we knew without a doubt that it was going to be 1 of the hardest things she would ever do & our hearts broke for her. We got there & the caseworker handed us papers to look over & then she went in to have Miss A sign papers. As our caseworkers were with us going over papers, they then let us know that the papers making Charlie ours, were signed! I can't tell you what a bittersweet moment that was. There really are no words for realizing that our joy was now part of Miss A's loss. Even though she knew this was best for Charlie, it was not easy for her do this.(I have a whole post that I'm working on about birth mothers that I can't wait to share with you next week) We called our families as soon as we could to tell them the good news!! We kept his name a secret until we knew for sure that he was going to be ours. We couldn't wait to call our kids & families! Alexa even made us call school to give permission to have her phone on during class so she wouldn't miss our call! We got to hear about 15 teenage girls screaming with excitement in the locker room on that one!

Miss A was scheduled to leave the hospital that night & she wanted to spend the day with Charlie. It was the least that we could do to honor that request. We knew it was important for her to get that time with him. The plan was to come to the hospital before her discharge to get to visit with her & take some pictures. Those pictures are so precious to us & I can't wait for Charlie to have those when he's older. It was time for her to go & she got up to hand Charlie to me. We embraced & sobbed together as we both knew that this was one of the hardest things she would ever do. I wished in that moment that we could have done something to ease the pain but all we knew to do was join her in her sadness. She begged for us to just love him & take care of him & honestly that made the tears even worse! Her motherly instinct to have him cared for was so strong & that was just another sign to us that she loves him so much. It was one of the most bittersweet moments that we've had to endure & a feeling of the whole situation being unfair crept in. We knew that we set out to give a good home to a child but I don't know if anyone can really prepare you for the grief that comes along with it. I also know this is why I think about Miss A numerous times each day & why we want to raise Charlie to the best of our abilities.

That night I stayed in the hospital with Charlie since he wasn't being discharged until the following day. It was a long night for me but I just stared at his face in disbelief thinking that he was now our son. By mid-morning on Wednesday, we were discharged & we grabbed a bite to eat on our way to the hotel. We hung out there for the afternoon & then had to make our first of many trips to Walmart to get the rest of the essentials. We went out for a nice supper to celebrate & then went back to the hotel to settle in for the night. We had no idea how long we would still be in Utah but they told us that it only took a couple of days. On Thursday, we went out for lunch & then stopped by the adoption agency(which is Heart to Heart Adoptions) to take a picture of us with Charlie & with our caseworkers. They said it was a possibility that we could get clearance to leave Utah yet that day but we couldn't enter Iowa until Iowa cleared us. We drove to Salt Lake to at least say we saw something other than the inside of the hotel & hospital. I wanted to head back to the hotel to start packing up some things just in case we got clearance. Brian was skeptical that we would but we went back anyway. At 4:30, we had thought there was no way we would get to go home yet that day so we made plans for the evening of where we would go to eat. 15 minutes later, we got a text from our caseworker that said "You are cleared to leave Utah!" I don't think we've ever packed so fast! We were out of there in 20 minutes!! We made it to Cheyenne, WY that night & needed to stop & sleep. The next morning, we had a goal of making it to Sioux Falls for the weekend because then we'd at least get to see the kids since we would only be an hour away from home. So we start on our way & at 10:30, we get a phone call that Iowa cleared us! We were so shocked & literally couldn't believe it! So the plan was started to surprise the kids with our arrival home. Travel went so smooth & Charlie was a super traveler! Brian's parents took the kids out for ice cream & we snuck in the house. Boy, were they surprised when we came around the corner from the hallway! Yes, we got it all on tape & it is priceless! We still had to get Alexa home so we had texted the friend she was staying with to get her to our house. The plan was that she would come get her dress to be altered so we hid in our closet(where the dress was) & got another great surprise! It was definitely crazy in our house with all the excitement but it was great!

I don't know if there is another baby brother out there that is more kissed than Charlie but he has sure been loved on since we got home! So, Friday, March 25, 2011, we were a family of 7 & life couldn't be crazier but it also couldn't be better! The road to Charlie was a long, difficult one but we'd do it over again in a heartbeat for our little boy. God is always faithful & He is always good!

Tasty Tuesday

Yep, forgot last week! The lack of sleep is causing my brain not to function in the memory department! I love, love, love this next recipe & I will warn you that you need to make more salsa than what the recipe calls for because you will need to eat the leftovers. I was skeptical on this one because I'm not always a fan of sweet & savory but it was so good!

Easy Pork Tacos with Mango Salsa

1 1/2 cups chopped mango
1 small red onion chopped fine
1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro
2 tablespoons lime juice
salt & pepper
2 teaspoons vegetable oil
2 teaspoons minced canned chipotle chiles in adobo
1 1/2 pounds ground pork
1/2 cup shredded Monterey Jack cheese
12 (6 inch) corn tortillas-we used flour

1. Combine mango, half of onion, 1/4 cup cilantro, 1 tablespoon lime juice, 1/4 teaspoon salt, & 1/4 teaspoon pepper in bowl & set aside.

2. Heat oil in large skillet over medium-high heat until just smoking. Add remaining onion, chipotle, and 1/2 teaspoon salt and cook until onion is softened, about 3 minutes. Stir in pork and cook until no longer pink, about 5 minutes.

3. Off heat, stir in remaining cilantro, remaining lime juice, and cheese(we left the cheese to put on our individual tacos). Season with salt & pepper. Serve with tortillas & mango salsa.

We did grill our mangoes to soften them up & it was awesome but you don't need to. We also tried this with pineapple & it was also good but quite a bit sweeter. We also added cumin & garlic to the meat mixture. You really have to try this one!